Friday, January 30, 2004

most recently i have been going to bed around 10pm and waking up at 6:30am or not to have my devotional time with the Lord. just waking up. i am starting to feel like an old person. tonite i head to granger with my good friends, lucas and krissy. i am really excited for them to begin the process of planting a church. i know that the journey will be rough, but they are faith-filled people who have been given a vision, and i know that will be protected. we go tonite to hang out with people, share with them the vision of Oasis, and do some worship and ministry time. i love that the Lord blesses me with these opportunities to go and strengthen and encourage his body. i am excited to take my guitar and sing with them and over them. i think that of all the things i get to do with the Lord worship is one of my favorites. the holy place, the throne room of grace is incredible...there is no where more intimate that i know, and tonite i will share that with new friends. exciting.

i am filled with joy today. i know that it is always there but today i am on fire for life. it's weird because yesterday i wanted to kick life's ass :) i am a nerd, that just made me laugh out loud. i am not sure why these two extremes, but i was starting to feel bi-polar. just kidding. i know that this joy is available to me all the time, it is just weird how quickly i turn it off.

i also just finished reading FINDING CONTENTMENT...neil clark warren. you know the e-harmony dude. wow was it a real drainer. i picked it up because it was in our library and no one had read it yet. but now i know why. any contentment i did have is gone, alright so i am being a little extreme. it really wasn't helpful. i am not sure how to tell people to find contentment. i don't think that expecting contentment on earth is really a right desire. i mean this isn't our home and we are seeking contentment. i don't know any one who is completely content, if they were i think they would be terrible to hang out with. i mean there is something about the striving for more, straining on for something. where there is no vision my people die, right. so i guess being discontent is right where i am supposed to be. maybe next week i will seek my contentment on e-harmony, then again maybe i would rather spend my $100 on something more worthwhile.

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